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Fight Opinion goes to the movies
By Zach Arnold | October 14, 2006
OK, not really. We just find a lot of mass media article links about John Cena’s new movie, The Marine, and let you read them. You’re going to want to, for sure.
I am daring you, Erin, to go see this movie and give us your thoughts. For that matter, anyone reading this who has seen the movie — please post your thoughts in the comments section.
Keep your eyes open for updates at the BoxOfficeMojo.com web site to see what kind of business this new movie draws.
Reviews can be seen in full-post mode. You will be entertained.
- Oh My News (International – Entertainment): ‘The Marine’ Dollar-Store DVD Lunacy
WWE director John Bonito goes bonkers trying to drum up excitement with this film. Basically, “Marine” is 90 minutes of fireballs, unspeakable one-liners, and poorly choreographed fight sequences.
- Associated Press (via MSNBC): Yep, stuff gets blown up in ‘The Marine’
So actually, at its core, “The Marine†is a love story. It’s just hard to hear the heart beating though all the blasts.
- Boston Globe: ‘The Marine’ is a stiff salute to the action genre
Physically, the professional wrestler John Cena is to Matt Damon what economy is to travel size. It would take three Damons to equal one Cena. When it comes to acting, the proportions should be reversed.
- Calgary Sun: Cheesier than pro-wrestling
A second-rate Schwarzenegger, WWE star John Cena actually acts out this hack action-flick imagery several times in the course of the cartoon revenge flick The Marine — a movie I liked a lot better the first time, when it was called Commando. But at least that was funny.
- E! Online: ‘The Marine’ takes the right approach
…with a campy sensibility that ought to appeal to fans of movies starring Roddy Piper or Hulk Hogan.
- Detroit Free Press: Muscle-laden ‘The Marine’ knows its way around a tussle
Yet there are guilty pleasures to be found here, far more than in the insipid horror film “See No Evil,†the first WWE release. These guys don’t much about making movies, but they know how to stage a smack down.
- New York Newsday: A soldier of bad fortune
In other words, it’s like an action movie from the 1980s somehow transported through a bizarre wormhole to the strange future of 2006.
- Pro-Wrestling Torch: “We should have gone to the beach.”
(McMahon) also said the Films division is a “natural extension” of the wrestling product they promote 52 weeks per year. Based on the storyline holes and gaps in logic throughout the movie, it seemed as if the WWE creative team made a “natural extension” to writing the script.
- Buffalo News: ‘Marine’ wrestles with action formula
The action-hero deficit has grown so desperate in Hollywood over the last decade that they’re now drafting guys directly out of professional wrestling.
- Film Threat: What’s a muscular guy like John Cena doing in a flabby movie like this?
So why is this film gettng a two star review? Because in between the mayhem there is some fun to be found when Cena isn’t around.
- Salt Lake Tribune: Review: ‘The Marine’
What’s the difference between a World Wrestling Entertainment-produced movie and an actual professional wrestling match? Chances are, the wrestling would feature better acting and scripting with less predictable results.
- New York Post: Explosive Flick Preposterous to the Corps
You may remember this movie when it was called “Commando” and starred Arnold Schwarzenegger, especially when one of his cohorts says of the Marine, “He’s like the Terminator!”
Topics: All Topics, Media, Pro-Wrestling, WWE, Zach Arnold | 4 Comments » | Permalink | Trackback |
Oh gah. I’m not spending 10 bucks to go see John Cena and his chin. I wouldn’t mind seeing Kimber from Nip/Tuck kick some ass, but from the trailers, she just gets to play Helpless Wife. Blah. Besides, both my roomate and my Step Dad would forever mock me for going to see fake marines, hahah.
John Cena is codeine.
It looks terrible. He looks made out of plastic.
[…] Fifth and finally, Vince McMahon continues to find new ways to fail at something. This time, it was WWE’s new movie featuring John Cena in The Marine. It ended up finishing in sixth place (according to BoxOfficeMojo.com) at around $7 million USD. Look at the bright side, Vince, at least you only lost a few million dollars with this movie. It’s not like you lost an estimated $70 million US dollars on it like you did with the XFL. […]